Recently, while in Florida, at the Ladies on Life 5 years of ministry celebration, I sat on a panel with my fellow sisters and was asked this question, “What advice for Godly dating would you give to someone?” Those who were there were able to see the look on my face, you might say, awkward. Yes, that’s the feeling I felt as I read the question and then answered.
For one, I am pretty certain that there are many books on the subject. Questions on romance, love, and dating advice run as the top questions in magazines, talk shows, blogs, and the list goes on and on. I even remember listening to a story from someone that had just returned from a missions trip from a developing country where disaster had struck and poverty and disease were rampant. They mentioned that on the boat ride back to land, a local person was sharing their heart with the missionaries and telling how they were worried if someone they liked would feel the same way they felt about them. My goodness, this romance and dating subject seems to somehow be a universal thing for sure!
Many God fearing people believe different things about the “book of love” a.k.a. dating, courting, call it whatever you want, I call it falling in love. So here’s what I believe. I believe that God has a counterpart so special for you that you could not have dreamt them up. Scripture tells us in Ephesians 2:10, “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
Although this verse might not be the first scripture that comes to mind for finding your mate, I personally have found comfort, encouragement, and guidance in it. You see, I believe that if He has created me to do those good works, and if I don’t have the gift of celibacy (1 Corinthians 7) then surely my future counterpart has his good work plan, and there’s so much work to be done in the Kingdom of God and for the Kingdom of God. Therefore, I believe that God will guide me and show me just who that man is and just what the two of us will do for Him together.
So maybe you can’t relate to me, but one thing we have in common if you are a believer is that well… you are a believer. That you look to God to start and stop everything in your life. So here’s my encouragement- whatever approach, inspiration, scripture, workbook, book, small group curriculum, etc. that you use to guide you through this ultra-important part of your life, PLEASE make sure that God is at the center of it all. That He is leading the way. Trust Him, you might be at the place that you can’t trust yourself and that’s okay, just trust Him. He will pick a mate for you! You will know without a shadow of a doubt that God did it. In my opinion, that’s the best way ever.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)